Today, when it comes to weddings just about anything goes! But one rule of etiquette that will always remain... you must send thank you notes for all your wedding and shower gifts! So, here are a few tips!

Ordering Your Thank You Notes

You might want to purchase your thank you notes at the same time you order your invitations. Most invitation companies have thank you notes that match or can coordinate with your invitations.

Many couples are choosing monograms (bride's first initial, couple's last name initial, groom's first initial) or "Mr. and Mrs. ____" on their thank you notes. Also remember, that you should not send out thank you notes with your married name until after the wedding. So, you may want a few printed with your maiden name to take care of your shower gifts.

When ordering your thank you notes, it's always a good idea to order plenty of extras. You'll be able to use these notes after the wedding and it will always be a wonderful reminder of the wedding when you do!

What to Say

• Always mention the gift somewhere in the body of the note.
   
• Let the person know you like it!
   
• Mention how you plan to use the gift (or spend the money). For example, "I can't wait to have my first dinner party so we can use the new china..." or "Thank you for your generous gift... we've been saving for a down payment on a new house".
   
• You should also make at least one personal reference in your thank you note, such as... "We were so happy that you were able to come to California for the wedding".
   
• If you are writing the thank you notes, you should reference both you and your fiancée... "Steve and I really like the...". "Steve and I want to thank you for the..."

When to Send Them 

You always should acknowledge and thank someone for a gift - right away!

The rule of etiquette for thank you notes... for gifts received before the wedding, you should send out a thank you note within two weeks. For gifts received after the wedding, you have up to one month to send out your thank you notes. However, it has become acceptable today to send wedding thank you notes up to two months after the wedding, especially if you take a long honeymoon or invited several hundred guests!

Who Else Should Get a Thank You Note?

Remember to send thank you notes to all your host or hostesses of your engagement party, bridal shower and rehearsal dinner. You may also want to send thank you notes to the individuals who participated in your wedding (readers, etc.). Another nice gesture is to send thank you notes to any of your vendors that did a great job or exceeded your expectations!

Always give a special thanks to the bride's parents, groom's parents, maid of honor, best man and your Officiant or clergyman.

A Few Words of Advice

Don't let your thank you notes pile up... the task will become overwhelming and you won't want to tackle a mountain of thank you notes!

Also, don't think of writing out thank you notes as an awful, arduous task. Think about all the people that cared enough about you to come to your wedding and give you a gift. Thank them with warmth and sincerity!