Remember back to the best meals you've ever had. Maybe it was a Filet Mignon in Paris, or the Fettuccini with your fiancé on your first date or even a hot dog and a beer with your best friends at Wrigley Field. What made them so special? Was it the main course, the spices, the side dishes, the setting, or perhaps the people with whom you shared the meal? Likely it was the combination of all these factors.

Now think back to the best weddings you've ever attended. What made them special? Maybe it was the couple, the food, the venue, the flowers, the guests or the music. Just like your favorite meal, it's a number of important factors.

As a bandleader and a bass player, I have performed for hundreds of weddings. They have ranged from 50 to 300 guests, from the most casual to the most formal. The couples have been Italian, Jewish, Polish, and Korean among many other ethnicities. Great wedding can take many forms.

In my experience, there are a few factors which I've found to be consistent in all memorable weddings.

1. Hire the Best: Select the finest wedding professionals you can afford. Their expertise will give you the best results and save you lots of worry and, in the long run, money. This is a once in a lifetime experience. Do you want to trust it to a discount photographer or bandleader and hope for the best? A true professional's experience will help to solve problems before you become aware of them. Your willingness to trust them and work with them in a friendly, respectful way will make them want to give 110 % effort for your wedding. Trust who you hire; hire who you trust.
    
2. Leadership: For your wedding to run smoothly there needs to be one leader that you, your guests, and vendors can count on for direction. Ideally it would be your bandleader or a designated Emcee.
    
3. Teamwork: In addition to strong leadership, it's important to have vendors that are easy to work with. There's no room for ego maniacs for your wedding. Regardless of all their achievements, they should treat you as their most important client, not just a contract number.
    
4. Preparation: The more prepared you are, the more you can enjoy your event. Supply the Emcee with names and pronunciations of your bridal party, and the people giving toasts and blessing. Give this info well ahead of your wedding.
    
5. All About You: The style of your wedding should reflect you and your fiancé's personality and style. Your wedding should include only the people and things that you love. Don't be swayed by what you saw in some stylish magazine or what Martha Stewart says you must have at your wedding. Select your favorite colors, foods, music, etc. It's your wedding. All your guests should feel that the wedding reflects you.

Once cocktails, dinner and toasts are finished the most important part of your wedding is the quality of the music.

Music: Work with the bandleader to select the ideal music for your event. Tell him your favorite styles, artists and songs. Think about who is attending. Is there someone celebrating a special anniversary or birthday? Do you have a special song for your college friends or a dedication for your grandparents?

How to choose your music: Select songs that are the most danceable, not necessarily the songs you like to listen to. There is a difference. Your bandleader will have a great deal of experience in knowing what works and what doesn't. If you or your fiancé are of a particular ethnicity, tell the bandleader so he can be prepared. The goal of your dancing should be to include as many guests as possible. The more you can make them feel included, the more likely they are to dance.

First Dance: If possible, select a song that has a special meaning to both of you. Unless you have taken dance lessons or are experienced dancers, I would suggest selecting a ballad. They are the easiest to dance to and are the most romantic.

Father/Daughter Dance: Obviously, stay away from romantic repertoire. Sentimental songs such as Someone to Watch Over me, Way you look tonight etc... This song is typically shorter than the first dance.

Mother/Son Dance: The same rules apply as above. Another option is to have this dance as part of the Father/Daughter dance. About ½ way through the father/daughter dance song the bandleader invites up the groom and his mother to join them.

Bridal Party Dance: This should be a fun, upbeat song to get the party going.

Additional Tips:

1. Approach your day with a positive, enthusiastic attitude. Expect a wonderful evening. If you've done your homework, you will. Let the little stuff go.
    
2. Do not have any other areas open for your guests to wander off to. It will greatly reduce the number of people on your dance floor.
    
3. I wouldn't recommend a receiving line. It will dramatically slow down the beginning of your dinner hour. You be easily able to greet your guests throughout the evening.
    
4. Be sure to dance, it will encourage others to enjoy celebrating with you.

Remember the Keys to a Memorable Wedding Reception:

• Hire the Best Vendors
   
• Leadership at your Wedding
   
• Teamwork between your vendors
   
• Preparation of all Announcements and Introductions
   
• Your Positive Attitude

Get Ready to have the time of your life!